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| Monday, October 01, 2007 |
| It's not that bad.. |
It's just a picture, folks, I'm not that dumb.
Ah, but I nice glass of wine and a vicodan would be nice....
Just one Vic, maybe two, just enough for the warm and cozies to take over for a little while.
No, seriously, I've moved past dramatic cries for help. They get old.
It's sad when you don't even have the option to off yourself anymore, isn't it?
So, another day has come and gone. Have I told you I hate my new job? I do. It's boring, unchallenging, pays for shit and is lame overall. But, I trudge on. I'm still looking for a real job. To tell the truth, I could deal with this one if I thought there was the slightest bit of hope of a future or better pay. Truth is the guy who owns it doesn't really know what he is doing and right now he has his trust in people who could give a shit less. A guy a trained with a couple of days this past week, for example. What did my training include? Well, he played solitaire on the work computer all day while he had his laptop going with movies and tv shows on. All day. I worked with him Friday from 10am until 8pm, and that's all he did. All day long. I was left to peruse the other computer. Luckily, I figured away around their lame firewall and at least got to check out the news and stuff. This is the guy the owner thinks is a great employee, he's told me this a couple of times.
Anyways, enough about the lame job.
I do want to apologize for my despair the past week or so. I'm not saying I'm doing much better, but I am dealing. Part of it is the effexor withdrawal. It's brutal. I'm up right now because I dread trying to go to sleep. Between the constant ringing in my ears, the occasional electric shock-like twitch, the psychedelic ultra-bizarre dreams and the overall dizziness, getting to sleep is a bitch. Other than that there is the uncontrollable hunger, headaches, dizziness, random mood swings, intense mood swings and general feeling of impending doom. Life is grand. Who ever invented effexor was smart enough to make it so that it is just better to pay inordinate amounts of money to stay on it than suffer through the withdrawal. Yeah, I could see a doctor to perhaps get some help but A, doctors aren't free, and B, there aren't really any other solutions other than being miserable for a few months. I went through this one other time when I swore off pharmaceuticals. I went almost three months until it was unbearable.
I guess I'll try to get some sleep.
I honestly didn't really plan on blogging, I just wanted to let the 1 or 2 readers know I'm still alive. Of course, if I wasn't, you really wouldn't know if I was gone or just gave up blogging like so many others. I'll leave in my will, who am I kidding, on a piece of paper, that someone must log in and inform of my demise. I'll make sure they put up a few got pics of porn stars along with it, just to make me happy from the beyond.
Peace.
dLabels: effexor, Monday, poop, withdrawal, Work |
posted by dusio @ 10/01/2007 10:32:00 PM   |
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Name: dusio
Home: columbus, ohio, United States
About Me: Jaded, regretful, bitter and sarcastic. But a great guy!
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